Labor Day

This evening I had the chance to spend 20 minutes talking to my very close friends - thanks to the iPhone, we could chat as though we were in the hostel room in Goa engineering college except the conversation topics had changed from the crushes, and cute guys, and other dating tips to husbands, pregnancy, weight gain, labor, ... Nevertheless, there was the same laughter when we recollected old times, deep dark secrets that we shared, and more!

After an hour or so after the phone call, I took off for a run around 9 pm. During the initial part of my run, I was very happy to have made my parents day this year for Father's Day! I really did not know where I was going to run, I just wanted to run. Once I got my stride (around 15-20 mins into the run), I thought about labor and how the entire episode ended up for me. I always thought I would write about it but never got around to it. As I ran, I recollected that particular night (Oct 21st , 1:30 am) when I had to rush to the bathroom as I felt a gush ... yeah - my membranes had ruptured or in lay man's term - "my water broke".

I called the doctor from the toilet seat to make sure I gave her all the exact details of the color of the liquid that came out and the amount and everything she wanted to know. The doctor suggested that I come in, and come in with my labor bag ready as if we were having a baby. My husband and I had taken childbirth classes at the hospital, and as a part of the curriculum we were asked to keep our labor bag (goody bag), my hospital bag, and baby's bag ready on the last day of class. Diligent students that we were, we followed the guidelines and packed all three bags. We had a checklist to go through, and we had everything ready. The goody bag basically has things that you require on the day you go through labor. Now, for first time mother's this can be tricky, so the list really helps you, however, I personally think you really need to know what calms or relaxes you or rather what helps you get through pain. For me that was easy, the first item that went into my goody bag was my swim suit! Water has a very calming effect on me.

I did have some abdominal pains but at that time I did not know that they were "contractions", they were mild cramps and I could sit down, and they would pass away. Anyways, as instructed by the doctor, my husband and I got dressed, and headed out of the door with our packed bags. We did not know what to expect - I think many times that is a good place to be. The hospital is around 1.4 miles from our house, and in a very movie like fashion, as we drove to the hospital, we got pulled over by a cop! I couldn't believe this.. we got away as my husband explained that his wife is in labor ! I really felt like in the movies.

Once we got to the hospital, the nurse examined me, and suggested they start monitoring me until the doctor arrived. She recommended getting some rest until then. Little did I know that - it was the last night I would sleep through the night! Yes, it is 8 months today, and I have slept 5+ hours for may be 3 nights!

The doctor arrived around 3 am, she examined me, and said "Congratulations, you are having a baby!". I was exactly 36 weeks pregnant on that day, and we just looked at each other not knowing what our emotion should really be! I remember we asking her - " are you sure ?" and she said yes! She also recommended we get as much rest as possible since first time labor can last up to 16 hours! At that point, I was 2.5 cm dilated I think - so 1/4th the total dilation amount before the baby could make its way out!

I lay on my left side - and let my body move and rest in a position where the contractions were not causing me pain. I slept until 9:30 am to be woken up by the doctor on call for that day. The doctor was Eryn Munks and she was my favorite of the five doctors that I used to see in the clinic I was going to. I always wanted her to be the doctor that delivered me. She came to examine me and my labor had not progressed. She recommended I do things to progress the labor and she would check on me at noon.

Now, it was time to go back to the child birth class notes that we had taken, books we had read, and labor positions that we were taught. One book that helped me was "Breathe your way through yoga" a book written by a British mid-wife. She had positions for every stage of labor and yoga poses that would help progress the labor. My husband and I took this seriously and followed the poses - we walked through the hallways for 15 mins until we met the nurse - her name was Gayle. She was the most wonderful nurse I met, and I thank her for all the help - she really helped me get through the day.

She felt my pulse very soon - she exactly knew the kind of person i was. She quickly put me on a circuit. She recommended I spend 15 mins walking, 15 mins on the rocking chair, 15 mins on the birth ball, and spend 15 mins on my hands and knees. And I repeat this circuit a few times! I completely understood this language - right from my childhood, I have had a very structured lifestyle and having exercised all my life this kinda circuit made complete sense.

Karthik and I went through the circuit together - we did the "Couple's embrace" as we walked through the hallways - it is a very powerful position. You feel the energy from your spouse into you as you embrace - you get the feeling of sharing the pain together. Through the contractions, I kept practicing level 1 breathing as taught in the childbirth class. We also did the "Camel walk" to progress labor in stage 1. The rocking chair definitely helped through the contractions - you could rock the pain away! The birth-ball actually helped progress the labor a lot more than the walking or rocking chair. We followed the circuit and when the doctor came to see us at noon - we had made significant progress - we were at 5 cm dilation (1/2 way through) and she said "Good job! Continue doing what you just did !"

I looked at Gayle and asked her - "What next Gayle?" At that point, I had decided to have her coach me through the labor. I had found a person that I was going to trust and would have her guide me through the process. Karthik was my emotional coach, he was there with me all through the process, never left me for a minute through the entire day. Around 1 pm, my angel arrived - one of my closest friends - Gloria came to see us. I think her coming helped Karthik a little. There was someone whom he could trust me with. These are two people whom I am closest to in Boulder - and have known me since 2001!

Gloria always has a way to relax you, make you happy, and she has always encouraged me a lot. She held my hand when I needed, helped me through the pain as I continued through the deep breaths, and did whatever that was necessary at that time without saying a word to her! Such is our friendship.

One thing I had decided about labor after understanding the process, and all the medical details - I was going to have an open mind and do what is the best thing at that time. Normally I like to have a plan and have everything organized, but I had decided to go with the flow during labor. Looking back, I think that was the best thing to do. I had learned what are the implications of taking pain medications, about drugs that help progress labor and all the other medical issues that concerned child birth. Having grown up around parents who are both doctors, doing this research, understanding the process came naturally to me. I wanted to know everything that could happen to me when the day arrived! We were ready!

We continued to go through the circuit, and Gayle recommended I spend more time in the "hands and knees" position to progress the labor further. The doctor came to examine me again and I was up to 6.5 cms but she noticed that the baby's head was posterior and it could lead to "back labor" - i.e. a lot of back pain as the baby came out. I had suffered through back pain since 8 weeks and did not want more of it. I looked at Gayle. She seem to be calm, and once the doctor left she recommended the "hands and knees" position, this time for 30 mins. She adjusted the bed at the right angle, and she was confident the baby would turn. I just trusted her!

The contractions were now more intense - they would last about 4-5 breaths. For some reason, I only felt the peaks of the contractions. I could never feel when they started, but only felt when they peaked - so I felt an intense pain and then no pain. And the cycle continued. Karthik and Gloria did everything to make me comfortable. Karthik just would do the exact right thing that was needed to be done at that moment! I was amazed how good of a coach he was. I just let them control everything - and followed what they said. One thing that the child birth instructor kept stressing was "Child birth is natural" and what she meant, I realized when I was in the "hands and knees" position. I actually felt the baby move! When I told Gayle that - she said "The baby's head is in the right direction now!" It felt very magical!

After about an hour, with the intensity of the pain increasing, I knew what I should do next. I told Gayle I need to get into the Jacuzzi. She started filling it with water - I had brought bath salts with me, and I hopped into the tub. As I felt the contractions, I would start the jets. The jets would make me buoyant and help with pain management. I stayed in the tub for 45 mins, and came out feeling very tired. When I got out, the pain became very unbearable. I felt like squatting a lot - couldn't use the rocking chair any more, couldn't use the birth ball - I just cringed to the closet handles, let my body move as I had the contractions. They were more intense, and close together. The pain was just increasing. Gayle said "It is a good thing - you are almost there!"

All through the day, I had paced myself just like I do when I run. Every contraction I saw through, I told myself - that contraction was done, and I was onto the next contraction. In running analogy, I looked at that as miles that I ran. Once the mile was done, it was done. I remember doing the 1/2 iron man in 2005 and starting the half marathon after a 56 mile bike ride with a cramp in my thigh muscle. I had to run 13.1 miles with the muscle cramping. I took one mile at a time, and kept going through the miles telling myself, once this mile was done, I was one step closer. I used the same approach during labor.

Gayle asked me "Do you feel like you want to poop - do you feel the urge to push?" and I said "yes, I do." She examined me and said "You are ready!, Let's teach you to push" This was one thing they had asked us not to practice in our child birth class.

For some reason, for the first time in the day, I started feeling scared. All sorts of thoughts came to my mind - "was I ready for the baby ?" , "How will the baby be ? ", "How will my life be? " and many more. All these thoughts were coming to my mind when she was teaching me to push - my mind definitely was not in the present. It was distracted, I was scared. I did exactly the opposite thing - she asked me to hold my breath, and I released it. I felt terrible as I had done everything very well so far.. why was I holding back????

As I continued to push, and they could see the baby's head or in medical terms - "crowning", they decided it was time to call the doctor. The doctor arrived and I could sense a little pressure/tension. Eryn had known me through my pregnancy - I had seen her at least 5-6 times. She was very calm, patient and worked with me. Not sure if she saw it, but I was still not doing the right thing. I was holding back. It was about an hour that I was pushing - and she finally said "Shweta, I am going to give this a few more pushes - if we don't do this right, you might end up with a tear" - well that was sufficient for me - I remembered the line in the movie - The Matrix - "There is no spoon", and in 2 pushes, Adhrit was out!

My husband and Gloria came and hugged me. Karthik wanted to make sure I was ok. He cut the umbilical cord - I was happy he did that. I always wanted him to do that. I told him to go and see the baby as they took Adhrit to the other table to run few tests. I could hear him cry, but man I was happy the labor was over!

The doctors brought the little baby over to me. It was very nice to see him, and I felt very happy. I wasn't sure what was going to follow, but I was happy the day was behind me and I had a new buddy in life!